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Morning Squick

March 18, 2017

A couple of days ago now, I awoke at 4:00am to a disturbing sound in my left ear—a kind of squelching, skittering sound on my eardrum that I thought at first was water or accumulated cerumen (earwax) or both. But after turning and tilting my head in various ways to try to dislodge the obstruction, I noticed that it didn’t slosh, and it kept occurring, intermittently. It didn’t sound or act like liquid. In fact, it sounded like… legs.

There was nothing else to do. I got out of bed, gathered a container of warm, clean water and a syringe, then stood over the bathroom sink and flushed out… an ant. Just a tiny sugar ant, to be sure, but still—eurgh.

This is perhaps the creepiest single thing that’s ever happened to my body—I’ve been very lucky, I know.

As one of my coworkers said, though, “It could have been worse. It could have been a spider.”


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